Interference in My soul - Disappointment / 6:39 AM

Man I wish I was a cross breed. Maybe a Sang SINdraGoAn? make out the words if you can.

Nope it's not a song or anything like that. Just What I'm feeling right now. I open this so-called-new chapter only to frown upon the same disappointment again. Nothing is going better than in my tiny little hope thats always seems to be missing at the wrong time. yeah right. Now a pile of angry whispers are floating through my head, no, more like jumping and stomping. Sometimes i wonder, what IS  perfection? Is there actually ONE connotative meaning? I don't think so (as learned from Introduction to Communication Principles). Everyone perceives this, perceives that. But really? Am I really just asking too much? Am I seriously super-sizing my tiny little hope to a super-sized jester? Pfft. Go here, go there. But where am I now? I have no idea. I lost count of my steps on the way here (wherever 'here' is). Hmm.. Maybe that's the problem. Maybe I should have left some bread crumbs as I walk away from simplicity just to achieve glory. Oops! Cats out of the bag! Glory. Am I just craving for that? Who knows. Heck, I don't know. But the cats out for some reason. I don't know if I let anyone down for leaving but hey! don't worry, I'm pretty mad at me too. Maybe, I should have just did like I did in secondary school, listen to mummy and just forget my silly dreams and just swallow it with a loud shout amongst others. Why the hell am I trying? Or attempting to try? See that's the thing. There's people who keep trying and succeed, there's people who keep trying but fail, and then there's me; the one that ATTEMPTS to try. Oh and of course there's those who get it at every try. Woohoo! what a fun funny ride in the yellow funky van this has been. I really appreciate it, but I'd like to find my way back now and just throw that old book and open a whole new one instead of keep opening disappointing chapters. Too much interference for my soul anyways.